Monday, April 28, 2008

missing philly while in seattle

seattle is a pretty city. see pics below. i like that it is grey. i don't like how often it is grey. everyone in this city is into organic foods, going green, very friendly, laid back and educated. there are some hippy people, ie. drum circles and what not, but i did like how everyone was into a healthy lifestyle, biking, hiking, sailing. quite different from my cheesesteak home town.

while in seattle, i decided to try as many coffee shops as bodily possible. i went to one in the queen anne district and the dude made a fern leave/frond on my coffee froth. cute huh? i thought so.

here is my list of pros for seattle
1) my new nephew max (cutest baby in the world)
2) chowder. it is good.
3) fresh fish and hence awesum sushi
4) easy street records
5) space needle ( i don't care if that is touristy and tacky. it is cool. spacey.)
6) coffee places are everywhere and i don't mean starbucks and most use free trade and organic beans
7) it is a clean city. no litter. no homeless people really. no graffiti
8) food here is more expensive. just going out to eat is more expensive
9) drivers yield to pedestrians and are pleasant about it and don't honk or curse at you
10) it is grey for 7 months out of the year

cons for seattle
1) lots of hippies, old hippies, new hippies
2) drum circles (yup, even if it is cold out, here they are drumming away)
3) the birthplace of starbucks
4) it rains. a lot. the only city perhaps where everyone carries an umbrella with them 24-7
5) not a walkable city. they didn't have ben franklin design it like philly!
6) crazy big seagulls. they could eat me
7) no graffiti or any type of urban decay
8) there is no bustle of people, out on a saturday night and there was still no people out! wha?!
9) grunge
10) it ain't philly.

being such polite people made me on edge. sometimes, i think it is refreshing to hear someone curse out a cab driver. ah, home.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

leave a message

i can't get to my blog right now, but if you leave a message, i'll get back to you as soon as possible. thanks!

i'm in seattle. dudes, yup. i left 80 degree weather for 45 degree weather. doh.

leave a message after the dot.

check it out. space needle. science musuem fountain. it looks like space beetle.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

comic books, dice, rpg + girls= does not compute?

to all those in blog world and any lil' mushroom readers, i have a newsflash for you, girls read comic books. not many, but we do. personally, i frequent my local comic book stores prolly as much as girls around go to freakin HM.

my favorite jawn to drop mad cash is fat jack's comic crypt here in our city of brotherly love.

i reviewed it for yelp and this other fellow yelper on the west coast sent me this video, which made snort with laughter. like the dudes at fat jack's, you dont want to deter girls from coming into the store, (recall my encounter at brave new worlds comic book store. ahem). anyhow, the song holds truth in it.

yes, i have my own DD dice. yes, if you read superman, i will taunt you FOREVER. yes, i know where everything is in a comic shop. i do take great pleasure in buying my comic books and find it hilarious that they use brown paper bags so it looks like i purchased a bunch of pornos. funny.

watch the clip.

Friday, April 18, 2008

naked homeless dude

one of my favorite thing to do on my lunch break is to go to the comic book store, buy an issue and sit and read it in the park. often i will buy my lunch and just sit on a bench and read and people watch. mostly, i am reading. rittenhouse park is nice, a bir crowded, but i am little. i can squeeze onto a bench.

this past week as i sat eating my lunch reading swamp thing. yes, i am obsessed with alan moore. honestly, i would elope with him. but, only if he kept his beard. i think if you cut his beard, similar to samsom, you would be control the horror comic book world. i know, i know. with great power comes great responsibility. blea blea blea. anyhow, where was i? oh reading in the park. the day was a bit windy, but i was reading and eating my sandwich, happy to be out of the office. you ever realize how cliquey offices are? i mean i love all the people i work with, but most of them live near each other and go to ball games together, hang out on the weekends together, so they are all tight. i am kind of this dorky cog that doesn't fit into the machine. i need friends at work. my friends are avitars are pixelated. damn me being a gamer. poo,

hence, this is why i eat by myself in the park. lonely cog.

this particular day i was reading and i looked up to see a bum sit down on the bench across from me. he is sitting there. mumbling. but i pay him no mind. he has every right to enjoy this pretty day. i read about 2 more pages, when i glance up to find this bum shirtless. okkk. it isn't that hot out dude. how does a dude just decide to take his shirt off in the park? i roll my eyes and continue reading. now i look up again. i know. i am sooo asking for it right? now, the bum has his pants off. sitting in his boxers. i think to myself, well, at least he is wearing boxers, not a speedo or briefs. i continue to read. then i feel a shudder. the wind? i look up. no, it was like my innate creepy alert going off. yes boys, us girls have them built into our bodies. genetic code. double helix and crap. i look up and the bum has a wide grin and he is pulling his boxers off. i jump up from my bench and walk away. an unwanted peep show!

i walk a few feet and debated if i should give him money to keep his clothes on!

for some reason, i encounter odd bums.

last year, as i was walking to city hall, i saw two crazy things:

1) a homeless man almost stark naked who wrapped himself in seran wrap/plastic wrap, like a mummy. i have no idea why, but there he was in some mummy suit on market street. no one bats an eye. hello?! naked dude in plastic wrap!? come on, are we so jaded in philly?

2) walking back from city hall another day, i saw some dude pull his trousers down and drop a deuce in love park. yeah, lovely. it was like 2pm in the afternoon and he decides to release the chocolate hostages in broad delight in the park. it is one thing to avoid doggie poo when you are walking in this city, but now beware of human poo.

i totally need to summer somewhere. other than philly.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

the mouse who died a most horrible death

after so much rain, us urbanites were grateful for a sunny, lovely saturday to walk around our beloved parks, people watch, make fun of the suburbanites who take up the entire sidewalks with their families and SUV strollers, the bikers are out, whether they are couriers are not, doesn't matter. if you look it, people will believe you are it. the old men gather in the park to smoke their expensive cuban cigars. cigarettes are for the poor. the wealthy smoke cigars. nannies are out in droves, pushing the SUV strollers. asian babies are out in full force. some with asian parents. some with white parents. kids are running after pigeons. dogs are on parade. some in silly ribbons or clothes. others with their mouths muzzled. the young professionals with their briefcases, drink in hand, sitting outside at the cafe complaining how they had to work on a saturday. all in all, i paint a picture of a typical saturday in philly. it is mundane. it is trite. it can be overwhelming and annoying with the congestion and traffic. all of this makes it perfect. a perfect saturday morning.

i awoke on saturday. early. about 7:30. i am an early riser on the weekends. i think because i am so excited it is the weekend, that i awake with excitement. i wake up early to try to make my weekend last longer. in my head, this all makes sense. perfect sense. anyways, i awoke on saturday. i saw how lovely it was outside. i took a shower. made some coffee. sat out on my deck and drank in the sun and read my comics that i have neglected. it was bliss. as i soaked in this moment, my tummy growled. power pellets down. need food. need to feed myself. i never ignore the call of my tummy. it is like the bat signal. no, it is like the red phone the commissioner would answer. total emergency. i need eggs. i need more coffee. i need BACON. none of this turkey bacon. i need real bacon.

i call up my bff, jonathan. he is awake and he sounds like he is ok, not hungover. yes! let's walk around the city and find food. he's game. who says no to food?! no one i am friends with. upon feeding my tummy and restoring my health back to all hearts, we walk. browsing stores. complaining how all our friends are hungover. (you all know who you are! :) the day was just a nice calm day. it was a day of catching up on what has happened to us all week. contemplating what next hair style we should try. what music we used to listen to. what bands we miss. and who we wish we saw. it was a day to do nothing and everything all at once. again, a nice saturday.

as we walked back, our flow of conversation goes from off tangent back to the topic. it's how we roll. jonathan tells me a story. a story i can't get out of my head. even today, i am thinking about it. writing about it. it haunts me.

living in the city, even if you alone, you never really are. urbanites have unwanted roommates if you will. squatters so to speak. mice. not rats like our ny friends. but mice. little farmer field mice. i almost picture these mice wearing a bandana and a corn pipe. unfortunately, the mice in philly do not sport gingham. jonathan tells me he has a mouse. i said oh no. before i can continue to speak, he tells me there is more to his tale. he came home one night and saw a mouse sitting on his kitchen countertop. yes, urban mice are quite brazen. they sit and look you straight in the eye. you're the trespasser they seem to say, not them. i know this look. i've seen it! anyhow, he tells me he sees the mouse in his kitchen. he is still and the mouse runs
away from his grasp. but no, it runs into the sink and down into his GARBAGE DISPOSAL. wha?! i am speechless. what did you do? jonathan replies he couldn't fit his hand into the disposal to get the mouse out. he used chopsticks and left them hoping the mouse would use it as a ladder to escape later. no such luck. for 3 days, this mouse stayed in the dark dank disposal. jonathan was distraught. why wouldn't the mouse leave?! in my head as he is telling me the story, i am thinking, this poor mouse. he hid in a death trap. food goes down. it doesn't come back up. this mouse was doomed. what happened after 3 days? i am almost afraid to hear his answer. he turned on the water and the switch. it was over in an instant.

the mouse among orange peels, milano crumbs, coffee grinds, this was the mouse's burial ground. the sharp blades cutting him to bits.

other suggestions, he could have turned on the hot water and the mouse could have drowned or he would have escaped to avoid the water. smoke him out. he could have dropped poison. he could have called me. or next time, call me, i have small hands.

this poor mouse. he should have used the chopsticks. he should have known not to go into another man's kitchen. he should have gone down another hole. not the sink hole. a hole in the wall. he made a wrong turn. of mice and men. no, of mice and man. mouse vs. man. man always wins.

city mouse. RIP 2008.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

this mixtape works. i promise.

while brainstorming for my next comic, yes, i know i didn't scan in my other comic as i promised. i will. i got distracted by how nice it was out today and my white fiddle inspired me to make the mixtape of great old country singers. great WOMEN singers. i love twang and the rawness of classic twangy country. it has such honesty.

so i made the tape and i now i feel inspired to pick up my fiddle and try to work on some music. shaolin wolf will howl.

btw, that is the name of my band. shaolin wolf.

listen to the tape. drink a cold beer. no, better yet, whiskey as you listen to these women croon about love lost, love made, cowboys going away and cheating love. cry a single tear into that cold beer my dear.

another comic

gonna scan in another one.

the comic con is coming to philly in may. i am a regular at this event. ennis is gonna be there on sunday. i usually go saturday. now, i am torn. should i go both days? decisions. decisions.

ok. brb. gotta plug in my scanner.

i have spent all day walking around the city in search of eggs and bacon. bacon makes everything right.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

things in my head

lately, i have been obsessing.

here are some of my thoughts as i drift off to sleeps.

1) alan moore is one of my personal gods. rereading swamp thing. amazing. truly epic. the struggle of man v. earth, human nature v. mother nature, the lines of good and evil. my favorite: "the sound of steak sobbing." amazing.

2) my lack of sleep this week. been watching my clock digitally change and each time it changes, i do the math to see how much sleep i could get if i went to sleep the very second it changed.

3) my new pink yoga mat. it doesnt smell like the gym. hence it doesnt have that BO funk or smell like feet. thank goodness!

4) MARIOKART for the wii

5) stuck on song 2. no, not the song 2 by blur. the second song that i am suppose to be working on. i have hit a wall. no, i am sitting there staring at the inspiration, no muse, just crickets. crickets.

6) strike like a cobra. my mantra right now. give credit to karate kid.

7) searching for music on lastfm...most of the artists i love don't have music on this thing we call the internet

8) planning a vacation. missing the mountains in vermont. the smell of the sea hitting the rocks in maine. the martinis in LA...

9) the smell of honey and jasmine

10) the search for cowboy boots for my little feet

11) the concept of time. why do i always know the time and why does it bother me when people run late? why can't i find a wrinkle in time? seem so easy when i read it.

12) eating an apple a day. i have been doing this for the past 2 weeks. perhaps i am scared to catch that flu again? well, i do like a crisp apple. i prefer macintoshes. tart. crispy. or a nice braeburn

13) i still remember my old locker combination in high school, including my gym locker. i told this info and was called rainman.

14) organic jelly beans. vegan, but good. mmmm.

15) making lists and crossing them off.

Monday, April 7, 2008

yoga girls are the new cheerleaders

i never wanted to be part of the yoga trend. i take care of myself. i go to the gym. i walked or bike everywhere. i do my free weights. i've got some guns! :) everyone who does yoga always says, you have to try it. it is amazing! i wanted to seriously punch all this new age, i believe in crystals, fit, soccer moms, college girls with expensive stella mccartney yoga gear in the face. i did not want to join this yoga cult. no! no! no!

but then it happened. i did one class. i loved it. my body was all limber and i felt refreshed. then i went to my second class. then my third. it was like crack. you get hooked and you come back for more.

i had common sense to do a beginners class. you cannot have an ego in yoga. yet, somehow in this so-called beginners class, you do get some intermediate gymnast type i hail from the iron curtain girls who i think have no bones, all cartilage for what positions they can do. gees.

anyhow, i have been taking yoga for about 3 months about 2 times a week depending on my schedule. i have been progressing at my own pace. my last class, our usual calm instructor was replaced by a super yoga guru girl who barked out positions, downward dog, plank, upward dog, child's pose, back to triangle, back to warrior one. gone was my relaxed breathing and my confidence. i was sitting next to some yoga prodigy. i know yoga is not a competitive sport. it is not in the olympics. good god, who the heck would be watching yoga on tv?! ok, perhaps some dirty old men! but besides them, who?! i know yoga isn't a competitive sport, but i think the whole asian in me to always succeed, be perfect, be the best comes out and i think, oh der, why can't i do that?! i need to try harder.

this class was filled with yoga girls. the ones who have the perfect mat, the yoga get up, their water bottle and they chat before class about wheatgerm or flaxseed and how they all do yoga twice a day. blea blea blea. i realized that these girls are the new cheerleaders. instead of pompoms, they have yoga mats.

these yoga girls in their perfect, no body fat bodies walk around and while i sit there playing my nintendo ds waiting for class to start, they are talking while doing splits, poses, hand stands. i feel so lame. should i be practicing my poses instead of playing ninja gaiden!?

this last yoga class, i felt a bit off. i felt like i was in high school and the cheerleaders would secretly smile at me and say stuff like, wow, nice shirt and then turn around and ridicule me since it was quite obvious it was a goodwill purchase.

here, in class, i felt like i didn't belong. i hate that feeling.

i am not one of those yoga girls. and i am not going to tell you how awesum yoga is and how everyone should do it. i will say this. boys if you do yoga, no unitards. girls, if you do yoga, prepare to have your self confidence shot to hell.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

everyone's equal on the bus

when i visited LA, i remember my friends who i was staying with told me i could use their car to get around. i told them i wasn't really comfortable driving in LA and i would take the bus. both gave me a look. "no one in LA takes the bus. pearl, that is for like the immigrant workers." i remember thinking, omg, what?! i replied. everyone uses the bus in philly.

it's funny. philly is a city with the haves and the have nots. i mean it is like that in any metropolitan city, but in philly, the lines are pretty distinct. you have the rich neighborhoods two streets over from the poor neighborhoods.

sometimes i get lazy in the morning and don't feel like walking to work, so i wait with the bus crew. all of us holding our 2 bucks, a token or a senior citizen pass. today as i sat on the bus, i often just sit and enjoy morning daze listening to music or reading. today, i looked around. the bus is an interesting biosphere of people. you have men in smart business suits who carry business cards with watermarks and wear cufflinks. you have blue collar workers with dirt underneath their nails going home from the night shift. you have old rich ladies dressed in their minks and holding their chanel bags. you have teen mothers with their babies crying and their siblings drinking soda and eating cheetos at 8 in the morning. you have students. college. high school. grad school. you have punks. you have yuppies. preps. thugs. here, we all are. sitting on the bus. giving up our seats to the elderly. we're all equal on the bus. you don't get a better seat if you are in a higher tax bracket. there is no snobbiness or attitude. taking the bus isn't reserved for the broke and middle class. it's for all classes.

i like how sitting on the bus you can have the business man sitting next to a thug and both are listening to their shiny iphones.

we all pay the 2 dollars to ride the bus and mr. investment banker has to sit in the seat that smells like pee in his brook brothers suit since he got to the bus late, while the homeless guy is sitting in a clean seat.

in philly, the bus always wins.