Wednesday, January 12, 2011

breaking up friendships

i tweeted a bit ago how i think it is wierd how we "break up" with friends. you can fall out of friendship with someone. i understand we all can through transitions and major event changes, but we all remain friends, and close friends with some people. i can count on one hand my steady crew. i have gone through events and changes and these 5 people all remain in my life and they are integral.

when you have snow days, you begin to think about stuff.

there are people i have known for ages who know me no better than my co workers and there are some people who i haven't know as long, speaking time wise, who get me. quality over quantity. simple math, i get it, i know.

i know that sometimes i am the one who breaks the friendship and other times it just is a mutual fade out or it is the other party who breaks it.

for example, i believe any of my friends who move from philly to nyc will no doubt be engulfed in the i need to be the coolest person in nyc so i need to diss philly attitude and we will lose touch. it is strange since nyc is only 2 hours away from philly, but might as well be guam.

i also think just because you have known someone for a long time, doesn't mean you are good friends. it also doesn't establish a friendship.

the best thing is not having or avoiding the break up and just having the friendship mutually fade out. sometimes distance, lack of common ground or you just realize hey this person is an idiot, all point to break up.

i think i am a good friend, but as of late, i have been breaking up with friends it seems. perhaps i am not as good a friend as i think i am.
if i ask my friends, they will tell you i rock. if you ask my ex friends, they may say that or say pearl who? or grunt disapproval. i feel like i haven't changed as a person. lots of things have happened to me, but i am still me. i don't go out looking for new friends, i'll just stick with the good ones i have.

10 comments:

hannah; said...

I just stumbled upon your blog before and read this and that's so true. That happened to me and my friend who were really close and then she got too close for comfort then we began to drift apart. Although now I know I have two friends who will be with me forever :)

Absolutely love your blog! I'm now following, check out my blog and follow if you like
www.invisiblesmile.blogspot.com

DL3 said...

I wish you happiness

http://dl3mashael.blogspot.com/2011/01/blog-post_28.html

LeBookworm said...

I completely relate to this. :P

Love your blog! Your writing style is adorable and it's such a fun read. ^_^v

documenting-my-feelings said...

hi THR LITTLEST MUSHROOM
i know what u r talking about coz i went through this ALOT lately my youngest friendship relation is 8 years i thought am i have a good friends and i loved being a good forgiving friend but i have littlest the mushroom, some times enough is enough and we should be smart enough 2 know when to call time of death of the friendship before it start consuming us, and finaly u should keep the nice memories u cllect through years and forgive ur friends and never forget.and forgiveness doesn't mean keep being friends

Chrissy said...

Bumped into your blog and thought it was funny because I was thinking and wondering the same thing. Another thought: How is it that people can be so important during a period in life, but then become strangers later on? Do you ever really lose the love that you had for them?

pearly said...

you all bring up some food for thought. i don't think we ever lose the love we have for our friends. i sometimes wonder if any of my lost friends miss me? i also wonder if some of these missed friends and i would even be friends now? people change. situations change. i get it, but i guess some friends find some friendships worth keeping?

Rohan92 said...

pretty much everyone seeing your blog must have related to this post. It's a shame that as humans we have the gift of recollection, and always wonder if we did the right thing by doing what we did months or even years ago. The best part is we usually come to the conclusion that whatever we did wasnt necessary, the grass is always greener on the other side...

odiofabrifibra said...

well said.

Young Money said...

It's crazy that this seems to happen to a lot of people. I always seems to cycle through friends every few years. It's never anyuthing in particular that happens. We just slowly seem to fade away with time. It's always sad and I always wonder what friends from days past are doing but sadly I never find the time, energy or motivation to do much about it. I guess on the bright side I get to constantly make new friends right?

Tycoon said...

Awesome blogs! Really true sentiments, no wonder you have so many followers!